BigMan

A new constellation has been born. A star too big even for its large earthly body, has risen from ashes like a phoenix and returned home, continuing to shine as part of our ancient galaxy.

It was in a hotel business center when an urgent notice came to me about Clarence. I was on tour in Europe, and immediately got on a plane to be by his side. Our closeness was no secret to anyone. I loved him. He loved me. A tough loss doesn't even begin to define the shifting paradigm that began in that moment. You see, Clarence was my Santa Clause... an immortal figure that always inspired goodness and hope. He brought joy with him everywhere. And though I was not blind to his short comings as a man, or the frailty that became his body, these were all quickly dismissed by his enormous and inescapable love. Being near to Clarence meant being protected, being accepted; both cared for and cared about.

Having been by his side for several surgeries and procedures, I became comfortable with the understanding that if all else failed and bones broke or organs gave out, My Beloved BigMan would still be here. They were able to replace shattered hips, worn out knees and even put a corrective machine on his heart... they would just keep fixing our (what we had coined) 6 Billion Dollar Man. His final passing has been beyond crushing.

Navigating the troubled waters of his failing health and into his eternal sleep has been trying to say the least. The burden of such a loss is insurmountably deep and heavy. Clarence was more than an uncle to me. He was my Hero. He loved me like a father, we talked as best friends, and played together as brothers. People would often go back and forth about our blood relation, and I've never been one to correct this... he was ALL of these things to me.

It's a strange new world without Clarence. He has given so much through the years, and now we are left with a gaping BigMan sized hole in the universe. Yet, as his gift continues to inspire, and as we all continue to process the vast changes of our reality I again turn to music. It's what I have. It's what he gave me from the first moment of seeing him on stage. It's what he's left me with now, and the closeness and the love he and I shared will always remain captured in a moment through pursed lips on a metal mouthpiece.

Thanks to Bruce, Glen, Eddie and encouragement from several others, I picked up an instrument and found my solace, again in music. From deep inside my lungs, as though blowing life through a hollow chamber, I can still feel him. Finding him in each note, near to me... alive.

People have been saying to me- "It's up to you now", "You carry the torch", "You are the legacy". But this job is not one to be fulfilled by any single person; Clarence was more than a saxophone player, he was an ambassador with a mission to spread Love and Joy to the world. It's up to all of us now. We must all carry the torch. We must all be His Legacy.

The world will continue to change, and the pain will continue to be present. But, today we can bare hope, that the marks he left on us will courage us on to be Bigger. To share the message of love and joy to the world, and to carry each other, even when the stakes are down.

Bruce would often say- "You want to be like him, but you cannot". Clarence said in one of his final memos "I'm here to tell you that you can be. You can be the next BigMan, but it's going to take a lot of work, a lot of determination, and a lot of inspiration... to be the next BigMan"

"In the end, 3 things remain- Faith, Hope, & Love, the greatest of these is Love." Thank you Clarence, for being such a great beacon; such a Big Man. In the very words you would often share so beautifully, I return this message to you- "I love you. The Universe loves you. Be happy." ...May we carry the torch well.

I'm back in NYC after being away for 7 weeks (the longest I'd been away in 3 years). It didn't seem like such a long time at first. Most places I love seem like old friends, no matter how long you're away, we pick up right where we left off. This time was different. I had forgotten about so many nuances that exist here. The sense of the constant party as people are still shuttling through the subway at 3am on a Saturday. The obscure crazy people who stare or shout at you that I somehow stopped noticing before. I even found myself disgusted for the first time in years upon seeing a large rat.. something I was sadly just used to in the past.

I spent Saturday with my Brazilian friends, sitting in on a samba set at a great Brazilian bar that afternoon. The next day was a surprise studio session with great friends! We worked on a song that kicked my butt previously, but this time it was a quick knock out of the park! We then went to our favourite Irish pub and sang and played music till the wee hours.. one of my favourite things to do in the world! Brendan O'Shea was there, Hansard, myself and a few other lovely people.

Good times, into Great times!! Thanks again New York.

What an awesome day!

First off, I love buses. Mind you, any form of travel is awesome, but there’s just something about being on a bus. Today I went to this fairly shady store front in downtown LA and picked up a ticket to ride a bus 6 hours to Phoenix, AZ. It’s my last stop to see my family before I head to Europe for 6 weeks.

When I got to the "bus stop", I had to go inside to make sure this was indeed going to take me to Phoenix. It wasn’t too convincing from the front of the building. When I got inside, the young girl working there didn’t speak any english at all. This put an immediate smile on my face! I was so excited that I was going to get a legitimate adventure out of this, and I didn’t even have to leave the country!

I was very anxious to see what the bus was like. I’m very familiar with the ‘Chinatown’ buses that take you from NYC to Boston for $15, and some can be amazing with nice leather seats and great wifi, and others seem like they’d been hi-jacked by bacteria and you might just find fish heads in the toilet (I know, that was pretty gross.. sorry). When the bus arrived I was extremely excited. It was large, clean, and incredibly spacious. In fact, I think I may have to say it was the nicest bus scenario I’d ever experienced. Huge seats with tons of leg room (even for me!), nice video screens, and the cleanest public bathroom I think I’ve ever seen, let alone on a bus!

Traveling for long periods of time bothers some people, but for me it’s amazing. No interruptions, no where else to be, just several hours to think, write, or watch an American film that’s been overdubbed into spanish! To no surprise the bus eventually stopped at a Mexican restaurant. This too was great! Chances were they wouldn’t stop at a place that wasn’t legit, and this place was indeed that. 2 Tacos al pastor, 1 side of frijol y queso nachos and a large horchata to drink.

A few hours later I was home; still full from a great dinner, and with a good amount of work completed! The next time I’m going between LA and Phoenix, without question, I’m sold! The bus it is..

Like I said… it was an awesome day!

Recording

Writing music is one of my favorite things to do, I’ll admit. Taking a raw moment, thought or feeling and turning it into sound that conveys into honest emotion; it’s really an amazing thing. Recording that music you’ve created can be somewhat of a scary thing though. When I write I often hit record and spill my guts. Everyone has their own method, but for me what functions best is for my heart to speak in the moment instead of my mind putting the pieces together. Recording sometimes feels like taking that raw, instantaneous moment and trying to reinvent it and package it into a permanent form. In some ways it’s kind of like getting a tattoo.. I don’t have any at the moment, but there is one I’ve been thinking about for the last 10 years. The only problem is when I really start considering getting it done, I have a hard time parting with my skin. The idea that I’ll never see that spot again. Once the ink is in that’s it- You’ve eternally locked in that moment. Whatever was going on in your life at the time is forever sealed in your skin. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, it just scares me to not be able to grow or change. In terms of music, it’s the same way. Once you lay that track down and release it, that’s pretty much it. What if you want to change something later? Or after a few years of touring that song you discover something new about it. I guess you can re-release something, but for the most part, that’s it. It’s done. A permanent representation of where you were at that moment, never to be changed. Maybe that’s a little overdramatic, but I take my music very personally. I realize at the same time that I can’t play live shows in your living room on command whenever you want to hear something (as much as I’d like that to be true) but I do appreciate the newness of every live moment with a song even though it may be 10+ years old.

None-the-less, I’m currently in the studio now. Hopeful to have a true and honest expression that can be heard and felt (on command in your living room). I want to create music that changes, and challenges me; and hopefully it will do the same for you.

Here’s to recording. I can’t wait to share it with you, and hopefully I’ll be in your town before we know it and we can share that honest, raw, and new experience of a live show.
Cheers!





All rights reserved by Jake Clemons © 2010

Fall In Love

I don’t mean this to sound prideful or arrogant in any unhealthy way, but I really love myself. I don’t know when that understanding came about, as I don’t think I was born or grew up feeling that way; but I’ve had a few discussions as of late on the topic and it seems a lot of people don’t care for who they are. I get the feeling that they just don’t really see the full picture, and I gotta be honest, this makes me really sad. I think we can all stop and recognize God’s mastery in in creation, but I fully believe that there’s something to be said about recognizing and realizing God’s mastery in his creation of YOU. That the same breath that spoke the universe into existence, spoke life into you as well. Can’t we celebrate that fact. I see all kinds of people and in everyone I see something different that sets them apart from others. Someone may have a more beautiful smile than anyone else, or their hands may carry a strength that is unique, or their cheek line could be staggering, or they could even have the most gentle and honest brow. Recognizing the beauty in those around you makes life that much more romantic and lovely, but I don’t think you can do that until you recognize the beauty in yourself. God made you. If the beautiful things we create are merely a reflection of God’s creative nature, then how much more beautiful is God’s creation? We as mankind are capable of tearing things apart, and destroying what is beautiful. I guess my point in all this is- STOP. Take an honest look around you. There’s a lot of things that we screw up, but if you can look past that to what was originally created, and the purpose behind it, you can see some really amazing things. See the complexities of that bamboo plant in your living room, or the tomato in your fridge, or those amazing eyes that you see in the mirror. You were created beautifully! Know that and maybe you’ll start to fall in love. We have a wonderful maker, you can count on the fact that he made you wonderful. Find some peace. And fall in love.

Overshadowed

I’ve had a lot of conversations over the past few weeks and it seems that the world is a bit stressed out. Everyone I talk to seems to be going through something or have something going on that’s not easy; like we just can’t get past this moment. Maybe you’re the exception, and I hope you are. For the last 2 years I think we as a whole have been forced to look at a mass uncertainty that maybe we haven’t been familiar with.

Between wars, economic crisis, ecological ruin, and rumors of upcoming solar flare disruptions, what do you do? How do you cope with that feeling of desperation and longing for peace and for love? I suppose these are big questions, but I often find myself reverting back to songs that I’ve written that, ironically I didn’t really know what they were about at the time. This is one of those songs. It will also be on the upcoming album. (The title lyric at the end was given by Ed North.. Thanks Ed!)


OVERSHADOWED//

Going as fast as we can, it’s getting darker I can barely see my hand,

As the lights flash by, the reflection of my image starts to cry... Again.


Face pressed to the glass, I can see it and my hearts burning for a chance,

See it a breath away, but I can’t quite reach it so I’ll stand alone and wait... Again.


Close your eyes, and take it away,

It could be so much better,

No need to run, to be here today,

Your free


The rush is always here, and my hunger’s getting stronger than my fear,

Feel the need within, as the pressure boils underneath my skin... Again.


Close your eyes, and take it away,

It could be so much better,

No need to run, to be here today,

Your free


Your overshadowed by the moment

So close your eyes, and take it away.

Life Seems To Inspire

Things have been crazy these days. With all that’s going on around the world... the groans of the earth, heart break in relationships... sometimes it’s hard to feel like you’re not living to survive. Just to make it to tomorrow. This is the view I’ve been writing from lately, and the songs are just spilling out. I know it’s hard when things are tough. I guess the question is, how do you find contentment & peace through these moments. I think that’s the key to life anyway, the “kingdom of heaven” if you will. I think we all want in.. Thank God we have music to help us get there.